The Poetry Of Earth Is never Dead

If it was 16th century, I would have said my Muse has left me....but here I am sitting in front of my laptop in the 21st century and trying to write something in vain. I push myself to write my first blog and look for some inspiration (that would work as my temporary Muse). I go through the celeb blogs, and there it was right in front of me...THE BIG BLOG. Yes...! Amitabh Bachchan's blog inspired me...it was a piece on how he felt before going on stage (the emotions were so similar to mine that I almost felt I can become a star as well).

It has been a month of being an alien in a foreign country. This is a strange place, they call us 'alien', but even the strangers would greet you in a warm manner. I wake up in the morning (after He does) and try to go to sleep again which never happens. I pull myself up forcefully and go straight to the kitchen. As soon as he leaves after having breakfast, I switch on our laptop and enter the CYBERWORLD. I chat with God knows how many people - known and unknown, I reply to all the scraps and stalk several profile (I have discovered that I am a good STALKER). I forget to look at the time...and time flows by until i discover I am awfully HUNGRY. I start worrying immediately (which is something I always do). While cooking the food I run about in our small kitchen almost tripping over at least twice....I use some of the choicest swear words in my Mother Tongue and feel relieved that no one is watching/hearing me. Sometimes while cooking I forget time and place, my mind travels 13000 kms in a jiffy...and I cross the Atlantic ocean, Europe and Africa...I reach my Home, such a sweet, delirious feeling and then...it happens-my neighbours hear a blood curdling scream ( do they know I exist? I scream therefore I am). I realise that in my delirious state I was holding the super hot container on the oven without any gloves. I run to the bathroom to put something soothing on the red spot that was growing threateningly.


After lunch I fall back in to my solitude. I lie down on my couch but nothing flashes on my "inward eye" and i don't find "bliss" in solitude unlike the great poet. This is the time for me to do some Soul Searching. I curse myself for being lazy (it doesn't help I still remain lying on the sofa), I turn to my big black Diary (but my Muse has left me, has made my pen infertile), I remind myself of my pending assignments from my online course (I feel worse). I stop thinking and start feeling I am a complete failure in life. All the promises I made myself in my younger days, are broken. I make things even worse as I feel homesick. The more I try not to think about them the more it comes to my mind. Eventually my vision gets blurred as does my memory, I feel a numb insensible pain and end up crying hysterically. I lie down and a calmness descends.


In the evening we head for the mall or shops. We roam around a bit and if something catches my eyes I try not to buy it (I fear that I am becoming a shopaholic). But as someone very wise had said " The best way to deal with temptation is to yield to it"-so I do .On way back home my husband tries to teach me how to drive. I start worrying immediately. I can even visualise myself hitting a cop car. With trembling hands I hold the wheel tightly as if i will hold on to it if errrr... anything goes wrong. I drive for sometime and just when I had started enjoying it I find myself on a pavement moving towards the Golf Course, He shouting frantically to hit the brake. I do so a little too late...I have toppled a handwritten board for yard sale. We return home safely, cook our dinner together and have a good laugh later.


I am back to my old self. Full of energy, singing on the top of my voice, a far cry from the older maturer sadder version of Me during the afternoon. I forget my responsibilities as a wife and daughter, I forget all the tragedies in the family...only the good times remain, only the laughter is remembered as the day ends. A similar day approaches with mundane affairs but I know that the poetry of earth is never dead...I look forward to tomorrow.